A new step forward for education and leadership » Help for making a difference

Developing Confidence…

anewstepforward — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 02:54:37 +0000

Gradually Increase Your Confidence

Many of us generally feel great, relieved and grateful when we leave the past behind, where we gladly and happily approach and enter a new year.

We tend to look at the beginning of a new year as a new era, as an opportunity for us to recoup and regenerate, an opportunity for us to re-evaluate our lives and where we are now.

We sit back and analyse where we went wrong and remembering with happiness where we went right.

Then, when we are set and done, we sit up straight, we stick our chest out and we start the yearly ritual of pondering what we can do to improve this year on the last.

Armed with a pen and pad, we start to think anew, think ahead, and, if we âre confident and courageous enough, we even set new goals or perhaps we rehash the old goals that we did not yet achieve.

That’s fine, even great. At least we started to think ahead and plan what it is that we want, and we hopefully set them as goals and not mere wishes.

At this point, I take it that many of you have undergone such a ceremony. Now, it is vitally important for you to realise that for you to be successful in your pursuit of your goals, whatever they may be, and for you to actually achieve those goals or aspirations and live the life of your dreams, you cannot afford the comfort of being unconfident.

To have anything that you want and to become the person that you want to become, you have to rise above your limitations and gradually increase the level of your self-confidence.

Lacking confidence in any area of your life is a stumbling block that you have to burst through or climb over. Or, at least, challenge your unconfident areas one by one and step by step.

Decide now that you are willing to move beyond the restrictions that you have in your life. Leave 2007 behind and don’t glance back.

Make a list of what you want to achieve this year, and take the necessary action to increase your confidence level to accomplish what it is that your desire.

You can overcome the lack of confidence step by step, one day at a time. For example, if you are lacking confidence in social functions, make it your weekly or bi-weekly goal to attend small social events, even at your local pub or club.

Pluck up the confidence and courage to introduce yourself to any person you feel you might be comfortable with.

Try it out. If that seems too much for you, stand in a strategic place where there’s lots of traffic. It won’t be long before someone strikes up a conversation with you.

Building on your confidence is just like anything else in the world. It takes practice and repetition.

Consistently make an effort to increase your confidence.

And the beauty is, any confidence that you build on in one area tends to overflow and increase your confidence in another area.

As you gradually increase your confidence, you become more comfortable in many new situations that you may encounter.

Confidence builds on itself and spreads to various areas. Make use of that. And before you know it, you will graduate to having a high level of confidence.

Filed under: Confidence

Website Email | Profile | About Hani Al-Qasem

Hani Al-Qasem is the co-author of “Self-Confidence Building in 7 Steps.” He is proud and passionate about his dream and vision to help inspire, motivate and support adults and children, of all ages, to be the best that they can be in all areas of their lives.

His life ambition is to reach and encourage 7 million, or more, people to reach their true potential.

Also, visit My Confidence Blog which is updated constantly.

You can also take your personal and professional life to a higher level through his
True Thoughts affirmation MP3 downloads.

Arthur Ashe on true success…

anewstepforward — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 06:19:52 +0000

“True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost.”
-Arthur Ashe

More looking at self…

anewstepforward — Wed, 14 Jun 2006 13:13:04 +0000

Like the last blog this one examines things what we can do as individuals to implement change and to influence our world. Think about the ripple effect that would happen if hundreds of thousands of people would work on making themself the best that they could be and striving to reach their maximum potential ! I believe that this would have a greater impact than the New Deal movement or era. Read the following and consider what you are doing to maximize your life !

Personal Accountability:
Are You Walking Your Talk?

Being personally accountable is less about achieving a goal or accomplishing an event. It is a journey that involves a continual pursuit of personal growth, attaining goals, improving relationships and increasing standards of performance. As we attain one goal the path of personal accountability involves celebration and setting new goals. All things are either in the process of growth or decay — plants, buildings, animals and human beings. Personal accountability is the process of making the choice on a continual basis to grow.

What does it mean to "walk your talk?" The obvious place many people look to find out if they are walking their talk is to look at the commitments they are making to others. Do you tend to deliver what was requested and agreed upon? Did you deliver on time? Do you tend to show up on time and prepared for work, for meetings or dates with your friends or that "special person?" These represent the outer commitments that demonstrate our level of personal accountability out in the world.

There is another important aspect to personal accountability that needs its own assessment. Are you "walking your talk" with yourself? What are the commitments you have made to yourself about your health, your job performance, your relationships, your self-care and your family? Are you delivering on those commitments and on a path of achieving your personal goals?

Ultimately, what you tell yourself and how you honor your commitments with yourself, may have an impact on the outer world commitments you make. As we integrate our commitments with ourselves and others, we can determine how well we are "walking our talk" and building our self-worth in the process.

The Process of "Walking Your Talk"
Based on the Personal Accountability Model described in our book, The Power of Personal Accountability, there are 7 steps to ensure that you are "walking the talk". This includes:

Establishing a clear Intention and Vision for your future (the talk part)
Recognizing the areas that you would like to improve
Taking ownership for the areas that you can influence
Forgiving yourself and getting back to your "walk"
Self-Examining the situation to look for innovative and creative solutions to make progress and solve old problems
Taking action on what you learn from self-examination
Developing a support network to assist you
Assessing results, celebrating wins and moving into your recovery plan when accountable actions don't achieve desired results

Taking Action to Walk Your Talk

Step 1: Creating a Clear Intention — Your Personal Vision of Excellence
Before you can walk your talk, you must have a talk that represents excellence. An Intention or Vision of Excellence represents a verbal "picture" of what you would look like if you were operating from a position of excellence in the areas of importance to you. The most important rule about writing your Intention is that it must be a significant "stretch" beyond your current actions and results.

If you are writing an Intention Statement related to your job, you would answer the question, "What do you want your reputation to be with your internal customers, your teammates, upper management and those that are impacted by your performance and attitude? What would you want them to say about you, that they aren't saying now? What would you be doing differently to earn that reputation? What is the attitude, behaviors and performance that would achieve the results of your reputation?"

If your Intention Statement is more about your personal life, what would that look like in your ideal scene? What kinds of relationships would you have and how would you be supporting those relationships? How would you be managing your time so that you are achieving your personal goals? What support system do you have in place to assist you when you get off-track or to keep you motivated and encouraged?

Your walk needs to follow in the footsteps of great talk. If your talk is negative, then your walk won't be far behind. Take the time to write your Intention and revisit it often as a way to stay motivated and create the inner-talk to be successful.

Step 2: Recognize the Areas that You Want to Improve
It takes courage to look into the "mirror" and do an honest self-assessment to recognize your areas of strength and needs for improvement. The key in conducting this assessment is to evaluate yourself based on the standards of your Intention, not your current level of expectation. Look at all aspects of your attitude, behavior, thoughts, communication, organization and performance. Include your response to stress, change, success and set-backs.

Step 3: Taking Ownership for Areas You Can Influence
After conducting your assessment, identify the areas in which you want to celebrate your talents, successes and previous work you have done on yourself to improve yourself in the past. It is important to talk success after walking success, so that you build on success.

Celebration is one step to achieve your next improvement. Now it is time to identify those areas of improvement that you are committed to change. What determines a commitment? The willingness to take action regardless of the obstacles that show up along the way. Obstacles can come in many forms. Your job, family, friends, negative thoughts, emotional disturbances and set-backs. Commitment is demonstrated through action, and taking ownership is making that commitment to yourself to do something different than you have done before. Ultimately, the commitments you make turn into goals. Unfortunately, people create goals before they have commitments and then build a history of failing to achieve their goals.

Step 4: Forgiveness and Getting Back to Your Walk
It is important that if you have any regrets about not being further along towards achieving your Intention or goals that you do self-forgiveness. This is the process of giving yourself "a break," having some compassion and trusting that you are doing the best that you can. And, even if you feel you could have done better, you are doing that now, so keep your focus on how well you are doing now. It is hard to drive the car forward without running into obstacles along the way if you are always looking in the rear view mirror.

No matter how strong you focus on your Intentions and take action on your Intentions, at some point you will make a mistake, have a set-back, or go back to old habits. It is important to have a "recovery plan" to get yourself back on track as soon as possible. A "recovery plan" is a predetermined set of actions or behaviors that will move you back towards your Intention when you get off-track. Sometimes it is a reminder from a friend who understands your Intentions and goals. Sometimes it is taking an hour break at some point in your day to re-read your Intention, forgive yourself for mistakes and acknowledge yourself for progress as way to re-engage with your positive direction. Expecting perfection is the trap and being prepared for set-backs is the key.

Step 5: Self-Examine the Situation to Uncover Creative Solutions and Approaches
Before you go walking, you may want to explore different ways to approach the way you achieve your Intentions, commitments and goals. Is there a new way to gain support that you haven't used before? Are there new approaches in your thinking, your process, your habits, your behaviors or your reactions that would serve you in accomplishing your goals and commitments? Are there others you could learn from who have achieved similar goals?

Step 6: Take Action Based on Learning
Movement, continual movement is a major key to success. It's from taking action that we demonstrate our commitment to ourselves and others. By taking action we learn what works and doesn't work so that we can continue to improve and refine our thinking, behavior, communication and performance. Action creates progress and progress leads to success.

Step 7: Develop a Support Network for Assistance
We don't have to walk the talk alone. No one can walk the talk for us, but we can have many people support us in walking the talk. How many Presidents of the United States achieved that position alone? Even the greatest leaders have a cadre of supporters who assist them in staying focused, solving problems that surface along the way and making decisions based on Intentions, commitments and goals. There are several kinds of supporters. Some are motivators to get moving and keep moving. Some are mentors who have lessons to share about being successful and keep us honest when we get off-track. Some are emotional supporters who assist us when we are down. Finally, there are the supporters who act like cheerleaders, who believe in us and want the best for us. All of these supporters are useful and part of walking the talk.

Step 8: Evaluate, Celebrate and Recover
The final step of this never ending process is to evaluate your progress to date. While tracking along the way is important, this step is more about taking a time out to evaluate what you have accomplished through your efforts. Sometimes, you will find that you are making great progress, while other times you may find out that your efforts led to more learning than to making progress. Both are valuable and on-track for success. It is critical to celebrate your action, your movement and your learning.

Where you are off-track with yourself and others, it is important to use your recovery plans or to develop new ones for greater refinement and success. You may even have to apply these eight steps all over again to move to another level of excellence. The key in this step is to revitalize your Intention, your commitments and change your goals accordingly. Yes, "walking the talk" is a continual journey where the talk and the walk are evolving as you grow and develop. Success becomes more of a process than an event. Success is a series of stepping stones and "walking your talk" is the path.

The above is another resource provided as a way of giving you the best organizations to help you become a change agent. The contact info is below.

IMPAQ
9000 Sunset Blvd, Suite 525
Los Angeles, California
800 332 2251
contactus@impaqcorp.com

Self Evaluation

anewstepforward — Tue, 13 Jun 2006 08:21:54 +0000

Sometimes we think everything needs to change except for us! Have you ever considered that the easiest thing to change is yourself ? We have little control over the legislature, the President, the Governor and sometimes even our boss but what we do have control over is ourself.

When Harry Truman was thrust into the presidency, by the death of Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Sam Rayburn took him aside.

"From here on out you're going to have lots of people around you. They'll try to put up a wall around you and cut you off from any ideas but theirs. They'll tell you what a great man you are, Harry. But you and I both know you ain't." said Sam.

Let's not forget to evaluate ourselves every day!